As the austerity budget in Ontario went to a vote, activists from No One Is Illegal - Toronto and Occupy Toronto issued a call for a mass protest and day of action on May Day.
A 30-foot by seven-foot banner was dropped off a highway crossing last week, cheekily telling early morning motorists to call in sick on May Day, when immigrant, workers rights groups and Occupy Movements across North America will be marching together against the incursions of the 1%.
Though capitalism and corporate greed have infected much of Toronto since the late 19th century, its most virulent form, "austerity" has only recently turned into a pan-damn-emic.
"Most Torontonians are sick and could use a day off," explained Lana Goldberg of Occupy Toronto.
"People are suffering with Harperitis and have serious headaches from Fordotrophy, which makes it really hard to work and make a living," she added. "They should call in sick on Tuesday and come to the rally and march. A nice day in the sun will help."
Sunlight is the primary source of Vitamin D for people living in North America, which is necessary for healthy living and good for one's skin. Sunlight also increases serotonin and balances the body's circadian rhythm.
"Though sunlight is a temporary cure for our current maladies, a good dose of protest could really help people recover," added Yogi Acharya of No One Is Illegal - Toronto, who has been organizing May Day demonstrations in Toronto since 2006. "The Spring season in 2011 saw a surprising break-through in many parts of the world against these illnesses. We are hoping that Spring 2012 will be similar in Toronto."
Activists have assembled a list of common ailments that people cite when calling in sick. These include Harper-flu, Fordotrophy, Capitalism, Borderitis and the most parasitic one, Colonialism.
Symptoms include homelessness, unemployment, loss of immigration status, poverty, hunger, feelings of powerlessness, fear, apathy, boredom, cultural decay, loss of identity, deportations, loss of free speech, incarceration and/or revolutionary thoughts.
It is unclear whether calling in sick is still legal in Canada. In early April, the Canada Industrial Relations Board deemed that Air Canada pilots calling in sick a few weeks ago were engaging in an illegal strike. Rumours have also surfaced that multiple washroom breaks might soon also be declared illegal.
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